


Resolve

by mistyautumn



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015), Superman & Lois (TV 2020)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Gen, M/M, Multi, One Shot Collection, Story Collection
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-18
Updated: 2020-12-14
Packaged: 2021-03-01 04:21:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 35
Words: 13,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mistyautumn/pseuds/mistyautumn
Summary: Originally just the ficlet "Resolve", this is now a collection of one-shot drabbles and ficlets featuring Brainy. The first chapter is an index of each piece with descriptions and featured characters / ships to help you find what you are seeking.
Relationships: Alex Danvers & Kara Danvers & Querl Dox, Alex Danvers & Querl Dox, Kara Danvers & Querl Dox, Kara Danvers & Querl Dox & XTC, Kara Danvers/Querl Dox, Querl Dox & Alternate Earth Brainiac 5, Querl Dox & Ayla Ranzz, Querl Dox & J'onn J'onzz, Querl Dox & Lois Lane, Querl Dox & Nia Nal, Querl Dox & Nura Nal, Querl Dox & Winn Schott Jr., Querl Dox/Nia Nal, Querl Dox/Winn Schott Jr.
Comments: 132
Kudos: 54





	1. Index

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An index of the ficlets to be found here. Newest works are at the bottom.  
> For my other works featuring Brainy, check out my [Querl Dox](https://archiveofourown.org/works?utf8=%E2%9C%93&work_search%5Bsort_column%5D=revised_at&include_work_search%5Bcharacter_ids%5D%5B%5D=216684&work_search%5Bother_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bexcluded_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bcrossover%5D=&work_search%5Bcomplete%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_from%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_to%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_from%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_to%5D=&work_search%5Bquery%5D=&work_search%5Blanguage_id%5D=&commit=Sort+and+Filter&fandom_id=5148298&pseud_id=mistyautumn&user_id=mistyautumn) tag.

[**Sweaters**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/55538059) \- _Brainy and Winn_ \- Winn teaches Brainy about ugly holiday sweaters.

[ **Movie Night**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/57023299) \- _Kara, Alex, Brainy, and Nia_ \- The gang picks a movie for movie night.

[ **Soup**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/55537525) \- _Kara and Brainy_ \- Kara is sick. Brainy brings her soup. A lot of soup.

[ **Spiders**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/55537756) \- _Brainy, Kara, and Alex_ \- Brainy has some feelings as he watches the footage of his spider possession.

[ **The Language of Flowers**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/55538590) \- _Kara and Brainy_ \- After “The Bottle Episode”, Kara wants to show support for Brainy, and flowers might do the trick.

[ **Caught**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/55538212) \- _Alex and Brainy_ \- Alex confronts Brainy about the Toyman surveillance footage.

[ **I Wanna Hold Your Hand**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/55538314) \- _Dreamerdox, Karadox, Winndox_ \- Three Valentine’s Day drabbles sharing the common theme “I wanna hold your hand”.

[ **Lucky**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/55538671) \- _Brainy and Alex_ \- Brainy and Alex consider his new place at the DEO.

[ **Fine**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/55537237) \- _Alex and Brainy_ \- Alex finds Brainy in a state at The Tower.

[ **Resolve**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/55264183) \- _Brainy and Alternate Brainy_ \- Brainy pays a visit to the Brainy in the bottle.

[ **Strings**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/55573168) \- _Brainy and Nia_ \- Nia comes to the DEO in the middle of the night after she dreams of Brainy.

[ **Big Sister**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/56082745) \- _Brainy and Winn_ \- Brainy and Winn talk about Alex.

 **[Don't Go (Stay)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/56248414)** \- _Brainy and Winn_ \- A missing moment from "Back from the Future (Part 2)"; Winn and Brainy say goodbye.

[ ** **The Many Charms About You****](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/56522758) _\- Brainy, Kara, and Alex; Karadox_ \- One movie night Brainy finds his feelings for Kara grow clearer.

 **[ **Preferable**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/56581516)** \- _Alex and Brainy_ \- Alex and Brainy get caught in the rain.

[ **Begin Again**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/56762368) \- _Nia and Brainy; Dreamerdox_ \- 1,000 kisses seems like a good place to start. _**  
**_

[****We're Halfway There****](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/56811265) _\- Kara, Alex, and Brainy_ \- They finally get Brainy to come out for drinks again. 

[****Before, After, Always****](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/56999239) **-** _Brainy and Kara_ \- Kara learns what Brainy's been hiding. _**  
**_

[**Brainy**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/57189973) \- _Brainy and Nura_ \- Brainy learns a little more about Nura's first dream of him. 

[**There is Magic in the World**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/57233845) \- _Brainy and Kara_ \- It rarely snows in National City. 

[**Up, Up, and Away**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/57284431) \- _Brainy, Kara, and XTC; Karadox_ \- Brainy is always working to better understand their daughter.

[ **Sunrise**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/57587434) \- _Kara and Alternate Brainy_ \- After the Bottle threat is taken care of, Kara spends a moment with Five. 

[**Sure**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/58102390) \- _Brainy and Alternate Brainys_ \- 5x18 spoilers. As the dust settles, Brainy wonders if he's ruined everything. 

[**Teenagers**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/58336915) \- _Brainy, Lois, Jonathan, and Jordan_ \- Reconciling two sets of memories can be a little jarring.

[ **End**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/58458304) \- _Brainy and Alternate Brainy_ \- Major 5x19 spoilers. Brainy fights to hang on. 

[**Junk**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/59295559) \- _Brainy, Ayla, and Winn_ \- Ayla thinks Brainy's apartment is a barren wasteland of personality.

[ **Find the Bottle (Save the World)**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/60042052) \- _Alternate Brainy and Kara; Karadox_ \- Meeting Earth Prime's Kara reminds Querl of his own Kara.

[ **For the Sake of Knowledge**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/60112696) \- _Winn and Brainy_ \- Winn asks Brainy about a dark entry in his file.

[ **Proud**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/60552475) \- _Brainy and J'onn_ \- J'onn learns how Brainy got his inhibitors.

[ **Miracles**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/60626125)\- _Alternate Brainy and Kara; Karadox_ \- Another Brainy meets another Kara; the world is full of miracles.

[ **All I Wanted**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/60800227) \- _Brainy and Kelly, with Nia_ \- Brainy wakes to find Kelly watching over him.

[ **Goodbye / Hello**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/61050187) \- _Brainy and Kara_ \- Season three. Winn goes. Querl stays.

[ **I Recognize You**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/65102626) \- _Brainy and Nia_ \- After Lex is defeated, Brainy and Nia watch the sun rise.

[ **No Matter How Small**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23099263/chapters/68744514)\- _Brainy and Kara, with Alex; Karadox_ \- Earnest Brainy rescues a kitten, bringing it home to his Kara.


	2. Sweaters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Winn teaches Brainy about ugly holiday sweaters.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Something silly written for the holidays, this would take place during Season 3, because obviously Winn has yet to go to the future.

“And the point is that the sweater be _ugly_?” Querl asks skeptically, wondering if Winn is trying to play some kind of Dark Ages prank on him because given the time period’s thing about appearances it just seems _very_ unlikely.

“Ugly maybe isn’t the right word- tacky might be better. Tacky sweaters. Ugly is just more fun to say. And they _are_ ugly, ya know, but it’s for a special occasion. I wouldn’t just wear an ugly sweater every day.”

“You do wear an ugly cardigan every day.” Querl frowns and Winn glares.

“ _Hey_ , my sweaters are not _ugly_ , they– this is about _you_ , not _me_.”

“And the sweater is a religious symbol?”

“No! I mean- I guess it can be, but it’s not necessary.”

“So the sweater celebrates the birth of the baby or the lasting oil? Or is it a pagan solstice sweater?”

“Uh, it’s… it can be equal opportunity?” Winn rubs the back of his neck.

Querl smirks and for a long moment Winn stares before his mouth drops open.

“Are you messing with me?”

“I have looked up the significance of the ugly sweater.“ He holds up his cell phone. “I have read five blog postings, a 2011 article by Time magazine, and an article about proper holiday party throwing by a Miss Martha Stewart.”

Winn rubs his temples in exasperation. “You… are a massive pain in the ass.”

“I am going to create the _ugliest_ sweater.”

Winn gives Querl a look that can only be described as unimpressed. “You’re gonna have to beat _me_. Mine’s hideous.” This time it’s Winn who smirks, picking up a garish pile of what looks like fabric, tinsel, and blinking lights.

“We shall see.” Querl tilts his chin up, fingers bridging, already seeing what he can synthesize. His image inducer could certainly make things interesting…

They arrive at Kara’s apartment together.

When Alex opens the door she spits out her drink.


	3. Movie Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang picks a movie for movie night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pure silliness in response to the prompt "fighting over what to watch for movie night".

“You say he is the _greatest_ showman?” Brainy looks to Kara, his eyes slightly squinted with skepticism.

“I mean, that’s the title of the movie-”

“The circus man. Who said ‘there is a sucker born every minute’.”

“That’s actually not confirmed.” Nia offers offhandedly. “Geez, Brainy, you believe everything you read on the internet?” Now she looks amused.

“It still seems _highly_ unlikely he would merit being the hero of a film…” Brainy looks at the movie cover, then at Kara, then back to the movie cover. “Is this the _Wolverine_?”

“He is the Wolverine.” Kara concedes because– well, because he is.

“Hey, superheroes can also sing and dance.” Alex sips from her glass of wine and smiles. “You should see Kara do _A Chorus Line_.”

“I do not doubt that, I only-” He pauses and looks to Kara again. “Is there video of you doing the chorus line?”

“We’re not watching videos of me for movie night.” Kara starts to laugh. “It’s not home movie night.”

“But that has my vote.” Brainy says. “I have voted, I vote for Kara in the chorus line.”

“ _A_ Chorus Line.” Alex corrects lightly, looking way too amused.

Nia has a mouthful of pizza, but she gives an affirmative thumbs up, her eyes looking equally _too amused_.

“Ok, maybe _after_ a movie movie!” Kara’s shaking her head. “We have to pick a movie.”

“Turn on the tv, I’m gonna broadcast it from my phone now,” Alex has a video on her phone screen.”Democracy calls for _A Chorus Line_ , starring Kara Danvers, the people have spoken.”

“Perhaps a Star War after, then my shaming can cease.” Brainy considers out loud.

“You’re RIGHT!” Kara jumps up to get the disc.

“Chorus Line first!” Alex calls, and Kara hears the familiar music coming from the TV.

“The MOVES!” Nia crows, and Kara tosses a piece of popcorn at her, laughing harder.

When the video is over, Kara is only blushing a little, smiling a lot. Brainy nudges her shoulder and smiles a soft kind of smile. “You are an excellent dancer.” He says earnestly. “It is statistically unlikely the Wolverine can compete.”

“Aw, Brainy,” Kara beams. Somehow it feels like the nicest compliment she’s ever gotten for dancing.


	4. Soup

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little fluff: Kara is sick. Brainy brings her soup. A lot of soup.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written before Crisis, this was a response to a tumblr prompt asking for Brainy to bring Kara lots of food.

Solar flares are never particularly fun, but having a solar flare and _immediately_ getting a sinus infection is _the worst_. Kara isn’t sure how she got from a scratchy throat to a blanket burrito on her couch in the span of about five hours, but here she is in a miserable lump, feeling a special gratitude and nostalgia for her usual sun-fueled immune system. ( _Nostalgia? Has it only been five hours? Five years? Time is funny in the blanket burrito._ ) There’s a daytime chat show on, but she’s not sure who the guest is- they’re talking about Christmas hacks? She may have drifted off for a minute… why is she awake again?

There’s another knock on the door. _Oh._

“Coming!” Kara calls, dragging herself up from the couch and tottering to the door. “I should warn you there’s a quarantine- Brainy!” She brightens as she opens the door to see her friend with a large paper bag in his arms, then she blinks. “Wait, aren’t you super friending?”

“Yes, I believe I am.” Brainy smiles confidently. “May I come inside?”

Kara steps back to let him in, and hopes he doesn’t notice the pile of tissues by the couch that she was gonna clean up, but when she was feeling less _gross._

“While the cure for your ailment isn’t yet invented, I did some research and I believe this remedy will be both helpful and bolstering.” He smiles again and sets the bag on the counter, taking out soup. _A lot_ of soup. “This is approximately five gallons of chicken noodle soup. It is meant to be both good for one’s health and one’s soul, though the latter is perhaps a bit questionable. Oh,” He reaches into the bag and take out “crackers, those as well, to compliment the soup.”

“Brainy,” Kara smiles genuinely. “I’d hug you but I don’t wanna get you sick. That looks amazing.”

“That may be wise, I shall have to take a look at this infection and see if my inoculations cover it.” He says thoughtfully. “Perhaps I can return to the DEO with a sample.” Noticing Kara’s gaze still on the large soup tupperwares, he hedges. “I know it is quite a lot, I was not certain if your usual appetite was affected by a solar flare. Is it? For future reference.”

“Kind of, but I can freeze some.” Kara opens the container and gets a ladle and two bowls. “And we can share some.” Though she’s tired and her head feels heavy, the smell and steam of the soup are already helping some, and Brainy’s thoughtfulness gives her a sense of being wrapped in a warm blanket. “Thank you Brainy, you really are a super friend.”


	5. Spiders

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brainy has some feelings as he watches the footage of his spider possession.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A response to the tumblr prompt "Brainy seeing the footage of what he did while the spider alien was controlling him, and promising to never scare Kara or Alex like that again".

Watching the security footage is surreal, unnerving. Something sinister inhabiting his skin. It is not quiet and calculated, not like when he was rebooted- no… this is bold and violent, hissing like a striking snake, taunting his friends, trying to belittle them, frighten them. The spiders that mark his flesh seem appropriate because as Querl watches, his skin _crawls_.

“I’m sorry I got angry.” Kara’s voice pulls him from his thoughts and he turns wondering how long she and Alex have been standing in the doorway.

Querl shakes his head. “I should be apologizing to you.”

“It wasn’t you.” Alex says gently. “Trust me, we know that _that_? Was not our Brainy.” She puts a hand on his shoulder and draws him into a hug that Kara piles into.

“All the same, I never want to scare you.” Querl shakes his head regretfully.

“You just wanted to help us.” Kara squeezes his shoulder. “I think we can safely just blame it all on the spiders.”

Alex grins a little. “That’s nice, we should put that on a pillow.” Her eyes crinkle at the edges as she bites back laughter.

“When in doubt, blame the spiders.” Kara laughs a little and Querl smiles too, grateful for the light and warmth the Danvers sisters can generate between them. “Once we get all this sorted out, I’ll break out the fabric paint.”

“Let’s get sorting then.” Alex nods, and looks to Querl. “Any new leads Agent Dox?”

“I’ll see what I can come up with.” He says with a decisive nod. Together they will figure this out. Together they’ll win the day.


	6. The Language of Flowers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After “The Bottle Episode”, Kara wants to show support for Brainy. She decides flowers might do the trick

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A response to the tumblr prompt "Kara trying to find the right flowers to give to Brainy ". This piece was actually updated and extended when I wrote a short sequel to fill a "flowers" prompt, featuring Brainy finding his gift.

Brainy’s been off.

She worries he’s isolating himself.

Kara knows he’s been through a lot; a _massive_ shift. She knows a little of what that’s like- such great change- but she can only _imagine_ what exactly he’s going through.

She wants to be there for him, but she finds to her frustration that for the moment, she’s not entirely sure how. He skips game night. Unless it’s work or missions, he seems to avoid… everyone. And Kara knows he’s figuring everything out, but she hopes he remembers what she told him… that they love him. That his friends are here.

_Maybe he just_ wants _to be alone._

So she walks to work, and thinks. She could try to get him to talk, but she doesn’t want to force him. Maybe bring doughnuts? Ok, maybe that’s just because _she_ could really go for doughnuts right now. She rounds a corner and starts as she nearly takes a bouquet to the face- the florist’s courier apologizing as Kara’s straightens her glasses.

“Sorry- I’m on another planet this morning-”

“It’s ok. Those look _beautiful_.” She says earnestly, gazing at the flowers. The courier smiles.

“I know, lucky lady, right? They’re a surprise from her girlfriend. I better get moving-”

“Have a good day!” Kara waves and smiles warmly, her eyes still drawn to the bouquet as the courier hurries off. She glances into the shop and bites her lower lip, a fresh idea forming in her mind.

_Flowers._

If they could make him smile; just remind him he he isn’t alone…

Heading into the shop, though, she immediately hedges.

_Rao, there are so many…_

Roses, carnations, lilies, daffodils, orchids; more she knows and still more she doesn’t. They come in a riot of colors and arrangements that send her mind spinning because there are so many choices, and what would Brainy _like_?

_(Will he like flowers at all…?)_

“Can I help you?” The woman at the counter pulls Kara from her thoughts with a little wave and Kara nods hopefully.

“I just wanted something little, I wanna make a friend smile…” She looks again to the flowers. “He’s been through a lot recently.” She sighs. “He likes purple, definitely, but there’s so _many_ and they’re all so pretty…”

The woman nods and comes around the counter, looking at the stock as well.

“You’ve definitely got options. Roses tend to be about love; this one here is statice, it’s usually sympathy, remembrance; the purple carnations are pretty but I think they’re…” She squints for a moment, trying to remember. “Ah, capriciousness?”

Kara laughs a little. “Does that mean moody?”

“Maybe… unexpected?” She rubs the back of her neck and smiles. “Some of it gets super specific.” She laughs. “Oh! Maybe hydrangeas? They’re supposed to be heartfelt emotions.

“I like that…” Kara nods, but her eyes are still scanning. They fall on purple irises and she picks one up gently. “What about irises? What do they mean?”

“Irises are wisdom, courage… and hope, too.”

Kara smiles slowly… _Irises_.

“Could I have a few of these?”

The woman nods with a smile. “Irises it is.”

—

It’s been a long morning; it seems they all are these days. Time apparently does not fly when one is betraying one’s friends (even if it is for their own well being). Brainy sinks into the chair at his monitor, careful not to make the weariness he feels evident, and after a moment registers what is sitting on the desk: A few purple flowers wrapped in green tissue paper.

_Irises._

For a moment he is confused; who would leave him flowers? Then he notices the purple ribbon knotted in a neat bow holds a note with the blooms. Taking it, he opens the folded paper, surprised to see Kara’s familiar scrawl.

_I heard that irises stand for wisdom and then I thought of you. They also stand for hope and courage, and I think you’ve got that too. And then I noticed this accidentally rhymed and thought I’d say: I’m thinking of my friend, and I hope he has a good day._

A soft huff of a laugh escapes him as he gazes at the note, then a wave of emotion hits; just how fiercely he _misses_ her. Misses _all_ his friends. Because even when he’s with them, he is not. And yet...

And yet they hold onto him. And perhaps it should be frustrating, the way they continue to ask him to game nights, they way he catches worried glances when they think he won’t notice, the way Kara leaves him irises to remind him he’s still loved...

Perhaps it should frustrate him, true, but in this moment... in this moment it gives him _hope_ ; hope that when this is all over things will somehow be alright. And in hope? In hope, he finds courage. He picks up the flowers and smiles wanly down at them.

_Hope, courage, wisdom, and a magic that is purely Kara._

_Irises indeed._


	7. Caught

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex confronts Brainy about the Toyman surveillance footage.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A response to the tumblr prompt "one of the Danvers sisters finding out Brainy is working with Lex, and him having to decide how to handle it".

“Shut the door.” Alex says as Brainy enters her office. Her voice sounds strange, tight. It sets him on edge. He closes the door; loops Lex’s surveillance on an instinct. She is looking at a screen in her hands. “Agent,” She looks up and Brainy feels his muscles tighten when her eyes meet his. “I need you to explain something to me.”

“Yes, Director-… Alex…”

She drops the tablet onto the desk and turns it towards him. He sees his own face and fights to keep composure as a sense of the floor falling out from under his feet seizes him.

“You know, it was hard to believe you’d have trouble with surveillance footage. I thought maybe you were- I dunno, re-calibrating or something, with all the changes, and back before he went to the future, Winn showed me a little bit of how to do this, so I thought I’d take a look.”

“It isn’t what it looks like.”

“No? Because it looks like _you were the accomplice_.”

He wants to be sick. To cry. To run. This is the moment he’s dreaded. She looks at him and doesn’t understand; she looks at him with anger, but worse than the anger is _hurt_.

“Yes.” He manages. Soft and toneless. Alex’s lips press together, her hands balling up.

“Why?”

“I cannot tell you.”

“ _Bullshit!_ Brainy, _what were you doing_?” She’s desperate for an explanation. For all this to make sense. For it to be some misunderstanding. He sees it all in the way she looks at him and his heart _aches_.

“Alex.” He swallows hard as his voice trembles, just a little; tries to reign himself in. “Please… Listen to me.” _What can I do?_

“Explain this to me. Explain why you _lied_. To me, to Kara, to _Winn_.”

He seizes that. “Winn is aware of what is afoot.” It is a sort of truth.

It makes Alex falter. “What?”

Brainy sucks in a breath. “It is something that I must do… something that must ensure the future…”

“It almost _ruined_ his future.” But her anger is abating into confusion.

“I didn’t create the doppelganger Alex. I tried to control the situation to the best of my ability. There were things that occurred that-”

“What things?” Alex comes around the desk, her dark eyes searching him, and he wants to tell her everything. Can’t.

“There was a chaos element that-… there was a factor I could not account for. It resulted in complications. Those complications were handled. The situation was handled.” He takes a breath and in spite of his better judgement, he takes her hands, as much for his own comfort as to comfort her. “Alex… I need you to trust me.”

“I do, Brainy.” She sighs. “I just-… Are you _ok_?” She takes his shoulders and looks him in the eyes; really looks at him. “After everything, you just seem-”

“I’ll be alright.” He makes himself smile softly, reassuringly. “Everything will be alright.” Again, he finds himself trying to steady himself as well as Alex. His friend. His chosen family. “I just need-”

“Time?” Alex nods. “It’s ok… Just-… just remember you’re not alone, ok Brainy? We’re here. Your friends are here. And we love you. Got it?”

He nods, and as she embraces him he hugs back, thanks her…

_You’re not alone, ok Brainy?_

He wishes it were true.

In this, he must be.


	8. I Wanna Hold Your Hand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dreamerdox, Karadox, Winndox - Three Valentine’s Day drabbles sharing the common theme “I wanna hold your hand”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little bit of a writing exercise and multi-shipping fun. 150 words each, featuring Brainy and sharing the title theme “I wanna hold your hand”.

They work together, but Nia avoids his gaze. She isn’t hostile, but she isn’t friendly. Querl is… what he has to be. Distant. ( _He wants so badly to hold her._ ) Cool. ( _He longs with every atom for her warmth._ ) He works constantly, for there is comfort in efficiency. The sooner they take down Leviathan, the less time these lies must go on. Fewer lies equate to a higher chance of forgiveness, and thus there is hope that when this is done his friends will still be his friends; that Nia Nal might still-… 

He takes a breath; tries to shake off such thoughts. He must focus. _Finish this_. It doesn’t make it easier to forget how badly he wants to take Nia’s hand and tell her everything. Ask her forgiveness; hope she sees that all this had to be. When his friends leave, Querl stays. He has work to do.

* * *

_Kara Zor-El is the sun._ Shakespeare said that. Not about Kara, but Juliet, rather. (Kara was, in some ways, Mon-El’s Juliet: they were young, in love, from opposing worlds, and sadly, very doomed.) Mon-El is the one who introduced Querl and the whole 31st century to Shakespeare, but since Querl’s been here in Kara’s time and actually read the complete works, he has a new appreciation for the poetry. Meeting Kara… it makes sense. 

Kara Zor-El _is_ the sun. 

He knows that her Kryptonian cells absorb yellow sunlight and infuse her with great power here on Earth, but science doesn’t account for the warmth and sunlight she _exudes_. No, it seems only poets can do that. It stirs something strange and new in Querl; the urge to take her hands and read her sonnets and make her _smile_ that he might live for just a moment in her radiant glow.

* * *

Winn Schott is smarter than Querl has given him credit for, and when it comes time for Winn to travel to the future, Querl thinks it would do well to remind him. 

Winn’s standing on the balcony of the DEO, looking out at National City when Querl leans against the stone beside him. 

“I dunno when I’m gonna see this again.” Winn says softly. 

“I am familiar with that notion.” He had it before they traveled back again, to place Querl in the safety of the past. 

He could rattle off statistics, or give Winn another pep talk, but instead he reaches out and clasps Winn’s hand, squeezing it in his own. He has _faith_ in Winn. 

So Querl’s dark eyes meet Winn’s and his thumb brushes lightly and he wills truth to him: _you are intelligent, courageous, admirable, good_ … One other thought, too: _I’m happy here, holding you hand._


	9. Lucky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brainy and Alex consider his new place at the DEO.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written for a tumblr prompt that just wanted Brainy to get a hug.

“It’s like the other you… she was director of the DEO, too.”

“Indeed she was.” Brainy answers quietly. He has thought about it; can’t _stop_ thinking about it.

Alex puts a hand on his shoulder. “Are you ok?” Her eyes are scrutinizing but soft; like a sister, she’s looking for tells. “Brainy, you don’t _have_ to stay there-”

“I do, Alex.”

He finally looks to her, dark eyes willing her to understand what she cannot know. _I must keep you safe_. He hopes he hasn’t stumbled; the cost of a mistake is unthinkable.

She pulls him in and hugs him tightly, and before he can even think, his arms are around her too because apparently he’s _needed_ this- more than he knew. It’s bread to a starving man; rain in a drought; she seems to sense it and holds him tighter, and Brainy hangs on lest he be swept away.

“May I tell you something?” He finally manages softly, drawing back just enough that he can look her in the eye.

“Anything, Brainy.”

“I am… truly lucky. To have a friend like you, Alex Danvers. And for that I am grateful. Knowing that I will be able to help you and Kara if I stay… it feels right. I am…” He searches for a moment for the right word, because happy isn’t it- his heart aches every moment he must lie… “I am proud to do it, Alex.”

She pulls him in again and holds him, and Brainy thinks not for the first time that every alien should be so lucky as to have an Alex Danvers in their life.


	10. Fine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Walking up the stairs and in, she stills as she realizes she’s not alone. Brainy is still at the computer, but he’s hunched forward, one hand over his face. It takes Alex a moment to register what she’s looking at: Brainy’s crying.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was written for the Supergirl angst week prompt “Stay with me…”.

Alex accidentally leaves her coat at The Tower. She’s almost back to her apartment when she realizes, sighs, and turns around because it’s her favorite coat and she _could_ get it tomorrow, but she’s gonna get it now.

Walking up the stairs and in, she stills as she realizes she’s not alone. Brainy is still at the computer, but he’s hunched forward, one hand over his face. It takes Alex a moment to register what she’s looking at: Brainy’s crying.

“Brainy…?”

His breath catches, his back jerking straight as he quickly wipes the tears away.

“Alex.”

“Are you alright…?”

“I assure you I’m fine.” The words come tonelessly, but he can’t quite hide the line of tension in his shoulders.

“Don’t do that.”

“Do what?”

“Lie.”

Something seems to ripple through Brainy and he looks away, dragging a hand through his hair and sucking in a breath.

“I am alright, Alex, I promise. I’m sorry to worry you.”

Alex sighs because she doesn’t know _what_ to think with Brainy these days, and she _saw him crying_ , but whatever it is he clearly isn’t inclined to elaborate and she can’t force him to. For a moment she misses Winn because she could _always_ get Winn to talk, but then she feels guilty… Brainy is Brainy, and she loves him even though these days she’s feeling woefully out of step with him.

“Ok, Brainy.” She looks at him for a long moment then goes and picks up her coat, pulling it on. “I’ll see you, I guess.” And she heads for the stairs, but as her foot hits the first he stops her with a word.

“Alex?”

She looks over her shoulder. “Yeah, Brainy?”

“Will you stay with me…? Just a little while?”

She turns, stepping back into the room and nodding. “Of course…”

“Thank you.” He says softly, breathing in, breathing out.

She pulls a chair up and sits beside him. Neither of them speaks, but Alex lets her shoulder lightly touch his. He bows his head and she wishes she could do something for him, but she does not know what he needs and he isn’t talking save to ask for this, so she sits with him in silence because for now it’s all she can do.

She sits with him in silence and hopes one day he will tell her the truth.


	11. Resolve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “All at once he is no longer in the DEO. Instead he is in a lab that is both his and not, facing himself.” Brainy pays a visit to the Brainy in the bottle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A tumblr prompt asked for Brainy talking to the Brainy in the bottle about what he is dealing with working with Lex behind his friends' backs. I imagine this takes place in a sort of mind palace created by Querl. For clarity, here Brainy is Prime, the Director is the female Brainiac 5, Querl is the Brainy in the bottle, and Five is “earnest Brainy”. The name ‘Five’ comes from [winterskywrites](https://tmblr.co/msftEBooPQVJ9fYx8U2c49g) (who writes amazing Brainy fic if you’re looking).

Brainy touches the bottle and closes his eyes, searching… The signature is familiar yet _strange_ ; himself yet _not_ ; clear yet _chaotic_. He sucks in a breath, sifting through every technological something he can sense, _searching_ …

All at once he is no longer in the DEO. Instead he is in a lab that is both his and not, facing himself.

“Hello Querl.”

“Hello…” The other Querl Dox is wary, regarding Brainy with cautious eyes. His shoulders still hang heavy with the weight of grief, but this time he doesn’t almost _crackle_ with the energy of fury, desperation, _pain_ … “You were seeking me. Why?” He doesn’t point out that though Brainy was the one doing the seeking, it seems the bottled Querl found him first.

“I thought-” He pauses, taking a step closer and holding out open and upturned hands in a gesture of peace. “I’d hoped we could talk.” He could have talked to Director Dox, or Five, and yet he’s found himself drawn here, to _this_ Querl. He’s loath to admit it, but perhaps it’s to commiserate. This Querl knows what it feels like to do terrible things for good reasons. He knows what it’s like to feel so _lonely_. Even with Five and the Director to encourage him, it doesn’t erase one simple truth: he misses his friends.

The bottle’s Querl circles him slowly, his dark eyes studying.

“Oh, I see.” He breathes. “I see what you’ve done.”

In spite of himself, Brainy swallows hard.

“I thought you’d know a bit of what that’s like.”

“Yes.” Querl comes to face him. “I do.”

“What did you feel? When you bottled this world?”

The other Querl considers that, his eyes going briefly somewhere distant. “Despair. Fear. Resolve.” His eyes focus on Brainy again. “Hope.”

There is a pang in Brainy’s heart.

“There was no other way to save them.”

“Indeed not.” Brainy murmurs. “…I fear what my friends will think when all this is done.”

It happens in an instant that Brainy hates himself for not predicting: Querl flies at him, slamming him into the wall and holding him there, the breath driven from his body. When he speaks, his voice is cold with fury; this is the man who hurt Nia. Brainy looks at him, completely still.

“ _Your_ world got to live.” Querl growls. “ _You_ are Prime. Of every universe, _you_ were chosen, and you would let it _burn_?”

Brainy shakes his head. “ _No_.”

“Even if your friends do not forgive you, _they live_. What comfort is holding your Nia Nal? Or fighting beside you Supergirl? What good is it if it _dooms_ them?”

“None.” Brainy manages, his voice tight.

“Indeed not.” Querl says softly, stepping back and releasing him. “I have crossed lines I never wished to cross. I did it to save lives. Are you better than me?”

“No.” He answers quietly; shakes his head.

“You and your Supergirl made a promise: to find a way to free my world from this bottle. _Do what must be done_. For your friends. For your world. And for mine.”

Brainy nods. “I will.” The fate of two worlds is in his hands… “Thank you…”

Querl gives a nod, then takes Brainy’s shoulders, gently this time. “I have no comfort for you.” He sighs. His eyes hold Brainy’s and they soften some. “Instead I give you _resolve_. Do what must be done.”

It is a refrain he knows; from the Director, from Five. It is a refrain he repeats to himself every day; a hundred times some days. He says it again now, his voice quiet but holding deep conviction.

Resolve. His resolve must be steel. He cannot waiver; cannot doubt. No matter what.

And after that… maybe there can be hope.

“You will survive this.” Querl says. “And for whatever it may be worth… I think your friends will understand. If not at first, in time.”

Brainy gives a nod and then he is in the DEO again, looking down at the bottle.

“Thank you…” He whispers.

Perhaps the Querl within had some comfort to give after all.


	12. Strings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nia comes to the DEO in the middle of the night after she dreams of Brainy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was written for the Supergirl angst week prompt “Why would you do that?”

Dreamer shows up at the DEO in the middle of the night and Brainy nearly swears, something anxious twisting in his stomach. Her gaze is intense and scrutinizing; it sets him on edge.

“What are you doing here?”

“I had a dream.”

“I see. And you felt the need to come to me? Why?”

She approaches slowly and Brainy forces himself not to retreat. He can’t be the one to blink.

“You’re covered in strings.” Her voice is low, something between accusing and asking. “And I can’t tell if you’re pulling them or if you’re the puppet.”

“I assure you-”

“I don’t know if your assurance means anything right now.”

He almost flinches, her words hitting him like a blow.

“Then they aren’t strings, they’re wires, and you’re all caught up in something.”

“ _Dreamer_ -”

“I’m not done.” Her eyes meet his and he falls utterly still, feeling a pang of fear. _What did you dream…?_ “There’s a big screen behind you, and you turn and all of a sudden there’s _Lex_ on it, and he tells you he needs you, and do you know what you say?”

“No.”

“Whatever you ask, Brainy. You tell him ‘whatever you ask’. Why would you do that?”

“Because it is my job.” 

“ _No_ -”

“ _Yes_.” His eyes narrow. “I am walking a thin line to keep my work here so that I can assist Supergirl, and _you_ -”

“Something is wrong!” She’s shaking her head and Brainy wants to be sick. He tries to find half truths, knowing that with every lie he tells he is less worthy of her love.

“Nia,” He says it quietly, trying to calm her. Pushes the thought that he’s missed saying her name to the back of his mind.

“I don’t just dream of you at work Brainy, it has to _mean_ something, and I- …Brainy… Is something happening? I am asking you, please, be honest with me… Please.”

“I am alright.”

She sucks in a breath and looks at him. He suspects that not for the first time she is trying to reconcile the man who stands before her now with the man she held in her arms; the one she loved; the one who loved _her_. _  
_

_Loves her._

“You should go home.”

She gazes at him for another long moment; hesitates.

“Dreamer,” He meets her gaze and wishes he could really comfort her. “I understand your dream was troubling, but I assure you I am in control.” 

“…Right.” She deflates slowly, stepping back. “…Goodnight, Director Dox.”

She leaves and Brainy watches after her, hoping his assurance does not wind up a lie; hoping he is the one in control of the strings.


	13. Big Sister

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brainy and Winn talk about Alex.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This takes place after Alex confronts Brainy in "Back From the Future (Part 2)", but before Winn leaves. It was a response to a prompt asking for Winn and Brainy discussing Alex.

“Alex knows something is not right.” Brainy says heavily, his shoulders sagging. “She’s...”

“She cares.” Winn says matter of factly. “I mean everyone cares; Kara, Papa Bear, far as I can tell Nia cares, but Alex is... Alex is the big sister.”

“She is Kara’s big sister, yes, but I’m not sure that is relev-”

“No.” Winn grins. “I mean, yeah, she’s Kara’s big sister, but not just Kara, you know? Once I started at the DEO she kind of adopted me, too, or at least it felt like it. Maybe she’s adopted you.”

Brainy considers that and smiles thinly. “I would be very lucky to have a sister like Alex. I’m lucky to have her for a friend. If she still...”

“She will.” Winn says softly, putting a hand on Brainy’s shoulder. “Don’t get me wrong, she’s gonna be mad, but she’ll forgive you. You’ll be ok.” He takes a swig from the bottle he holds and kicks Brainy’s chair lightly. “You will.”

“Is this knowledge of the future?”

“Nope. Knowledge of Alex. And you.”

Brainy takes a drink from his own bottle and lets Winn’s words give him some comfort, if only for a moment.

“She is a fierce friend. Sister.”

“Oh, god, she’s terrifying.” Winn laughs. “Ya know, I have never been able to keep a secret from her; she could break me in half.”

Brainy smiles wanly. “She wouldn’t do that.”

“Oh, no, she would.” Winn smiles with deep affection. “She would hang me out a window by my ankles if she thought I was hiding something from her,”

“She hasn’t tried that yet with me...”

“Yeah, she probably knows it wouldn’t work on you.”

“True.”

“But she’d also be in my corner in a second if I ever needed help.”

“We struggled, at first, to ‘find our rhythm’ as it was put. But... yes. Since then she’s always been there for me when I needed comfort. When I needed _anything_.” His lips purse slightly. “She did laugh the time I bruised my tailbone though.”

Winn snorts. “As any good sister would.”

“Oh, is that the way of it?”

“That is the way.”

In spite of everything, Brainy smiles.

“We’re both very lucky to have such a sister.”

“That we are, Brainy.” Winn nods with a smile. “That we are.”


	14. Don't Go (Stay)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Winn and Brainy say goodbye.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a little missing moment from the end of "Back From the Future (Part Two)". Written for the “don’t go” prompt for [elmayarafest](https://elmayarafest.tumblr.com/). Also for cyclone-rachel who wishes we’d gotten a Winn and Brainy hug.

_Don’t go._

Brainy watches Winn as he prepares to depart and rejoin the Legion and knows it’s a selfish thought, but there’s comfort in having someone who knows the truth. Someone he can talk to besides himself. Selfish as it may be, he wishes he could hang onto that comfort; hang on to Winn, for just a little while longer.

Winn looks to him and approaches, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Hey… it was good to see you again, buddy.” His smile is warm and genuine and soft; it stirs all kinds of emotions that Brainy can’t afford to show. Not now, when Kara, or Alex, or J’onn might see.

“Yes, it was good to see you, Winn.” He gives a nod and doesn’t put his hand over Winn’s like he wants to, but he smiles thinly, gratefully, hoping Winn knows what he feels…

_I’m sorry for this mess.  
_

_I’m glad for the happiness you’ve found.  
_

_Thank you for everything._

“Come on, bring it in.” Winn grins and wraps his arms around Brainy who slowly hugs back. “Hey, you’ve been practicing.” He teases lightly and pats Brainy on the back.

In spite of himself, Brainy squeezes a little tighter for just a moment before drawing away. “Are you implying I was not a satisfactory _hugger_?”

“That is exactly what I was implying, but now you win the star for most improved!” He’s still grinning, Brainy’s smile a little bittersweet in return.

“Please, give my greetings to everyone.”

“You got it.” He nods. “I’ll tell them.”

And he nods and gives Brainy’s shoulder another quick squeeze before going to say his goodbyes to J’onn, Alex, and Kara.

He knows it’s selfish, but all the same Brainy wishes he could stay.

_Thank you, my friend._


	15. The Many Charms About You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One movie night Brainy finds his feelings for Kara grow clearer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time for a little Karadox fluff. This was written for the “Embraceable You” prompt for elmayarafest. I went to the song for a little more inspiration and found it in "I love all the many charms about you / above all I want my arms about you".

Every week Brainy looked forward to movie night with the Danvers sisters. Eating take-out, learning about the classics, spending time with people who were dear to him; it was something special. They’d pick movies (no Star Wars yet- all their friends apparently wished to be present for that and schedules had yet to sync, so Brainy remained in the dark, but not the space of Star Wars dark because “Don’t you _dare_ look up spoilers!”) and watch them, talk about them; Brainy always had questions and Kara and Alex were always happy to answer any they could, Kara always eager to know what he thought.

It’s one night at Kara’s apartment, after watching a rather funny romance, that Brainy finds himself looking at Kara… She and Alex are laughing; Kara tosses a piece of popcorn in the air and catches it in her mouth, then Alex takes a handful and throws it up, catching two and calling “I win!” as the rest lands everywhere else. Kara’s eyes crinkle and she laughs hard even as she protests “that’s cheating!” and Brainy finds himself laughing with them, as Kara makes an appeal.

“Come on- Brainy, who won?”

“You do have super speed and vision,” 

“See!” Alex crows. “See, I’m just using my resources, and my main resource is volume!”

“No way!” Kara pouts, throwing a pillow at her sister.

“But!” Brainy shakes his head, amused. “Parameters for the competition were not set, so can there really be a winner?”

“Aw, party pooper.” Alex sticks her tongue out and Brainy huffs, chuckles, and looks to Kara.

“Not so.”

“Not so.” Kara agrees, sliding off the couch and scooching over to where he sits on the floor, hugging him around his shoulders. He imagines, for a moment, looping his arms around her; her smile is radiant, her laughter warm as summer… Her blue eyes meet his dark ones and for a moment the world stops.

He has known for a long time of her goodness; her heroism; her hope and how she inspires the very same in others- how she inspired it in _him_. What he is learning now is of her warmth, her exuberance, her charm- and Brainy is charmed indeed.


	16. Preferable

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex and Brainy get caught in the rain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little silly, friendly Alex and Brainy fluff today, which happens to be Chyler's birthday! This was written for the “rain” prompt for elmayarafest.

It seldom rains in National City, but as the saying goes ‘when it rains it pours’, and when the sky opens up while they’re out doing recon Alex and Brainy most definitely get poured on. They’re closer to her apartment than headquarters, so Alex makes a call and they head there, soaked through and shivering as the wind picks up.

“There’s towels and stuff in there,” Alex nods towards the bathroom. “I’m gonna get out of this and get dry.” She sighs, already tying to work her way out of her wet vest.

“Thank you.” Brainy nods, going into the bathroom and shutting the door.

“Just drape your wet stuff over the shower rod!” Alex calls before going into her bedroom with a fresh towel and peeling off her wet work suit. “Winn did not designs this for getting wet…” She mutters and wonders if Kara struggles this hard with her suit after getting rained on or plunged into the bay. Toweling dry, she puts on warm clothes and emerges, freezing when she sees Brainy standing awkwardly in her purple, silk bathrobe.”Oh my god.”

He looks down at the robe then back at her. “This was what was available– I can remove it, but, ah-” He puts a hand uncertainly on the belt and Alex throws her hands up.

“No!” And she starts to laugh, walking over to Brainy and putting her hands on his shoulders, torn between amusement and exasperation. “No, it’s fine- just- I figured you’d just grab a towel.”

“Is some form of clothing not preferable to a towel…?”

“Yeah, that’s fair.” Alex nods; she can’t argue with that logic.

“It’s a very nice robe.”

“Yeah, purple is your color.” She concedes with a slightly rueful smile. “I’ll have to get another one, then we can match.”


	17. Begin Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 1,000 kisses seems like a good place to start.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little Dreamerdox fluff, taking place sometime after the post Bottle Episode truth has come out and things are ok again between Brainy and his friends. For the elmayarafest “kisses” prompt.

“Remember before, how I said I like poetry?” Nia murmurs, her head tilting to one side as Brainy noses her neck lightly before kissing the same spot. “I like this better...”

“You know, I still have all the poems,” She can feel him smile against her skin; can practically see it. “I could multitask, I just need to get the book...”

“If you move, I will _tackle_ you.” Nia laughs. “One thousand kisses is better than one thousand poems, anyway.”

“I’ll start counting.”

“You do that.” Her hand brushes his green one and she leans back against him, content in his arms. His nose brushes her cheek lightly and she breathes a happy sigh.

“Doled out slowly or all at once?” His voice in her ear sends a sweet sort of shiver up her spine.

“Mm... slowly.” She breathes.

“Nine hundred and ninety-seven kisses remaining...”

Another laugh bubbles up from her and she snuggles into him. “You don’t have to be totally exact about it...”

“Now I’ve lost count. Shall I begin again?” His eyes crinkle at the corners and she touches his cheek, kissing his lips softly. 

“Yes, please.”

“I missed you, Nia...” He whispers. “So much.”

“I missed you, too.” Nia answers.

It feels good to begin again.


	18. We’re Halfway There

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They finally get Brainy to come out for drinks again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the elmayarafest “let’s dance” prompt, Kara and Alex finally get Brainy to come hang out. Bon Jovi ensues.

It’s been a couple of weeks, but they _finally_ get Brainy to come out for drinks at the bar. It’s a first since he removed his inhibitors, and Kara’s glad to see him, but she falters somewhat when it seems he’s not particularly glad to be there.

“Maybe this is just. maybe this _is_ Brainy now.” Alex says when Kara follows her to the bar to get drinks.

“I thought he’d be… happy.” She sighs, glancing back to where he sits at the table in the corner. “Instead it’s like he-… ” She shakes her head, chastising herself. “I’m not being fair. I know he must be processing a lot, and I don’t even know how to be there for him. I just…”

Alex touches her shoulder and gives it a comforting squeeze. “I know.” She says softly. “I’m worried about him too.”

He appears to be contemplating the plate of cheese fries Kara ordered for them to share, his face unreadable. 

The bartender sets down their drinks and Kara starts to take hers when a familiar song comes on…

“Livin’ On a Prayer,” Kara says, her expression slowly lighting up. “Alex, can you hold this?” She passes off her drink, hurrying back to the table.

“Let’s dance!” She beams, and Brainy looks to her, unable to hide a moment of surprise and confusion.

“What?”

“Dance with me?” Kara tries again, then grins. “I’ve heard you have excellent rhythm.” She says in her best impression of him. Something seems to flicker in his eyes and she offers her hand hopefully. His gaze shifts from her face to her hand and back. “Do you still like this song?”

“I do.” He says softly, and after a long moment he takes her hand.

_Woah, we’re halfway there…_

Kara suppresses the urge to jump up and down with glee and leads him to dance, twirling him, then herself; swaying to the music. When her eyes find his face again he’s smiling thinly and her heart leaps.

_Take my hand, we’ll make it I swear…_

It’s better than beating a Dominator to see her friend smile again.


	19. Before, After, Always

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara learns what Brainy's been hiding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written for the elmayarafest “always” prompt.

“So... you’ve been working with Lex...”

“Yes” Brainy says quietly, looking Kara in the eyes. She deserves that much. 

“How long...?” The sadness in those eyes is a gut punch. 

“Since the day after the bottle- ...episode.” He sees her take a deep breath, nod.

“Why?”

“The Director-- me... She showed me events from her world; just like ours... showed me where things went wrong, and how much was lost...” His hands ball up uncertainly and he forces them to relax. “She told me what I had to do to stop those events from happening here... to stop Leviathan... but it had to be in secret. I- I had to protect you, and I-” Unbidden, there are tears in his eyes; his voice cracks. “I’m not sorry for- for doing everything in my power to keep you-- you, and Alex, and- and Nia- J’onn, Kelly- to keep all of you _safe_ ,” he manages. “But... I am _so_ sorry... for causing you hurt... all of you...” He drags a hand through his hair; wishes it felt steadier. “I hope that you can forgive me... someday...”

“I forgive you, Brainy.” Kara says, without a moment’s hesitation.

“What?” He murmurs, stunned.

“I forgive you.” Then she walks to him and hugs him close, and slowly he hugs back. “I’m so sorry you’ve had to go through this alone.” She says softly. 

Brainy can’t speak, he just hugs her tighter as his breath hitches in his chest.

“I told you that day... you’re a good person, Brainy.” She draws back just enough to look him in the eyes. He finds he can’t stop the tears that fall from them but she reaches up with one hand to brush some away gently. “You did everything you did to do good.” 

“Yes.” He breathes.

“And everyone will see that. Even if it takes time.”

“Do you believe that...?”

“Yes.” She smiles and hugs him tight again. “You’re a _good person_. Before you took off your inhibitors, and after. Always.”


	20. Brainy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brainy learns a little more about Nura's first dream of him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Full disclosure: I know very little about the Legion of Superheroes outside of what the show has given us, but this thought came to me and I followed it. I hope my version of Nura Nal is enjoyable. This could be read as a follow-up to [Hope](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22311142); it’s not directly related to what I explored there, but they work as a timeline together for my thoughts on Brainy in his early days with the Legion. This was written for the “finding family” prompt for elmayarafest.

“You know,” Nura says (she’s sitting in his chair, her knees drawn up so she can rest her chin on them) “when I had my first dream about you, it wasn’t just about you becoming a hero.”

“Was is not?” Querl answers distractedly; across the table from her he’s working on a smaller force field generator. It’s delicate work but he finds he doesn’t mind her company and maybe even enjoys the chatter.

“That wasn’t all.” He can hear the smile in her voice and finally looks up at her.

“I see.” It’s _extremely_ probable she wants him to ask what she dreamed, but he stays silent- a bit of a game to see how long it will be for her to come out with it.

“Don’t you wanna know what else?”

“I assume if _you_ want me to know you’ll tell me.” Querl smirks, looking back to his work.

Nura rolls her eyes but smiles. “I dreamed of you finally feeling pride in your family.” 

At that, Querl frowns, looking to her again. “Pride? In my ancestors?” There’s nothing heroic in that… the thought alone makes him uneasy; he thinks of all that his father feared in him– all that _the galaxy_ fears…

Nura sets her feet on the floor, scooching forward and folding her arms on the table. “Family doesn’t have to be blood. Sometimes-… sometimes it’s people you choose.”

“I see…” Querl murmurs, considering that.

“…What I’m saying is… you have a family here. If you want it.” Nura offers softly. “I hope you know that.”

His eyes meet hers and after a moment he speaks. “I- Thank you, Nura.”

“Anytime, Brainy.” She says with a smile, before getting up and heading out of the lab.

Querl peers after her. _Brainy…?  
_

But Nura was smiling; calling him family in spite of his blood; accepting him for all that he is.

_Brainy…_

He doesn’t hate it.


	21. There is Magic in the World

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It rarely snows in National City.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A quiet moment with Querl and Kara. This was written for the “seasons change” prompt for elmayarafest.

_It’s snowing._

In the time he’s lived there, Querl has never seen it snow in National City, but it’s been unusually cold as winter has fallen and that with the uncommon drizzle of rain… 

He steps out onto the DEO balcony. The clouds make the sky all a deep grey, and at this hour even the bustling city is quiet. Flurries fall, illuminated by the lights that still glow in the night, and Querl reaches out, catching some in his hand.

He is eight again, for a moment, enchanted by the dancing flakes that swirl through the chill air and cling to him before melting away on his skin. It’s science; he has seen it many times by now, and yet there is still _magic_ in it. 

Letting out a breath in a puff of steam, he closes his eyes and turns his face up to the sky, feeling each flake as it lands on his skin and disappears. There’s something calming in it; centering.

There’s a familiar gust, then the sound of her boots touching down. He opens his eyes to see Kara beside him.

“Supergirl?” He’s admittedly surprised to see her; wonders why she’s come.

“I remembered you like the snow.” She smiles tentatively, like she’s not sure if she’s overstepping. “So I thought- …I wanted to make sure you got to see it. I didn’t know if you’d see a text in time if you were working on something.” She knows he doesn’t sleep much.

“Thank you.” Querl says softly. 

“I guess you already knew though.” Her smile goes a little sheepish.

“I’m glad you’re here.” He says honestly; showing more of himself than he knows is wise… “That we can share it.”

She brightens- _beams_ \- and Querl feels a fresh wave of gratitude and affection for her. Kara who is thoughtful, and gracious, and kind… who gets out of bed in the middle of the night to make sure he doesn’t miss a rare flurry of snow.

So they stand together and watch it fall, and for a precious few moments it feels like everything is alright.

“How are you doing, Brainy…?” Kara asks at length, looking to him. He can see in her eyes that she’s concerned; trying to give him space but still be there; not sure what it is he needs.

“Better… better now.” He answers. And in this moment it’s true. There is snow in the air, and Kara is here with him. 

There is magic in the world. 

There is hope.


	22. Up, Up, and Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brainy is always working to better understand their daughter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Playing with the idea of XTC for this little short. Thanks to cyclone-rachel for letting me bounce ideas off of her until I got something that felt right. This was written for the “I’ll be right here” prompt for elmayarafest.

“Are you ready?” Querl asks softly, warmly; kneeling at XTC’s level and watching with amusement as she bounces on the tips of her toes. Kara grins as their daughter nods eagerly.

“Are you coming?” XTC asks hopefully.

He’s monitoring everything he can, working to understand how his Coluan biology mixed with Kara’s Kryptonian comes to play in their daughter; making sure that her technological facets don’t faulter. This girl they’ve made is singular, unique, and they are both of them determined to keep her safe.

“I’ll be right here beside you.” Querl promises, smoothing her hair and rising to stand.

Today is a particularly special day in better understanding their daughter… From the moment XTC began exhibiting powers she’s been eager to experiment with this one.

“Up, up, and away?” Kara beams.

“Up, up, and away.” XTC breathes.

Their girl takes her hand, then Querl’s, and together they take to the sky.


	23. Sunrise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the Bottle threat is taken care of, Kara spends a moment with Five.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s the final prompt for elmayarafest! The evil is defeated! This one is “thank you”. I’m dedicating this to cyclone-rachel who made sure I wasn’t doing all these alone. She is lovely and talented, and you should check out her writing. Rachel, here’s a little Five and Kara-- sorry I kinda couldn’t resist sharing bits yesterday while I was working on it; I hope it makes you smile. Thank you

Walking out of Al’s Bar, Kara spots his yellow boots swinging idly overhead... he’s sitting on the roof, watching the sunrise; this Brainy who isn’t hers yet acts like they’ve known each other forever; who sees the miracles in tragedies, and seems to face every challenge with good humor... she finds herself smiling and floats up. 

“Hey, mind if I sit with you?”

He grins and pats the spot beside him. “Not one bit.”

She sweeps her cape aside and sits next to him, following his gaze. “I don’t do this enough... watch the sunrise.” 

“A new beginning.” He says, head cocking lightly to one side. 

“A miracle?” She asks.

“Sitting here and watching the sun rise with you?” He’s still smiling. “Oh, yes.”

She gazes at him for a long moment, marveling.

He laughs and takes her hand in both of his, turning slightly so he can face her. “I should thank you.” He says, dark eyes earnest and alight. 

“Me?”

“For looking out for me. Well, other me’s.”

“Oh! You don’t have to--” Kara feels herself reddening; he’s still got her hand.

“Maybe not, but I’d like to.” He looks at her for a long moment, and there’s something in his eyes Kara can’t quite read.

“You find the good in people. See it. Help them see it.” He gives her hand a squeeze. “It’s wonderful.” He beams, then adds “ _Inspiring_.”

“I- Brainy... Thank you.” 

“Ah-ah, I’m the one doing the thanking.” Another quick squeeze and a wink of his eye, then he lets go of her hand, looking out again at the rising sun and breathing a contented sigh. “Beautiful.” 

Kara looks out again, taking in the moment...

_It is._


	24. Sure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the dust settles, Brainy wonders if he's ruined everything. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Major spoilers for 5x18. This is probably… not good. But I have a lot of thoughts and I’m trying to sort them out somehow.

Watching Nia walk away feels like a wound tearing open in his chest; standing exposed and trying not to bleed out in the wreckage of… everything. 

It feels as though everything Querl has done to prevent _horrors_ , spins fresh horrors of _his_ making and he swallows down a wave of nausea and looks to the rubble that _was_ the DEO; was his work; was his _home…_

 _The DEO is a ruin. Rama Kahn has Kryptonite._ _Lex will find out that I tried to go around him. Kara and Nia do not- **cannot** understand.   
_

He could be pinned beneath that stone again for the way the knowledge weighs down and crushes him.

 _Stop it._ Her voice is grounded and sure; another Querl, from another world. _This isn’t over yet._

Querl takes a slow breath, closes his eyes.

_You’ve come this far, haven’t you?_

_What if I’ve already failed?_

_And what if you haven’t?_

He breathes out; looks around… It’s chaos; like everything that circles Lex Luthor. He could almost laugh, almost find _comfort_ in it, if he could shake the way Nia looked at him, or the image of Kara in kryptonite fused agony.

 _You’re in the trees, my friend._ Another voice, another him; wry and warm and again so _sure_.

 _Why can’t **I** be sure?_ He feels a touch of envy.

_It’s like I was saying; you’re all focused on the trees. Don’t miss the forest. Your friends are alive. **You’re** alive.   
_

_And how do I keep it that way now?_

_You’re Brainiac 5._ He can almost see the wink. The grin. _I know you’ll figure out something._

_I have to convince Lex not to cut me out…_

_Then convince him.  
_

And when night falls, and the limo comes, he tries to feel sure. 

He cannot be anything less.


	25. Teenagers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reconciling two sets of memories can be a little jarring.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written for cyclone-rachel's prompt "Brainy meeting Clark's sons, and being surprised at how old Jonathan suddenly is (like 'the last time I saw you, you were a baby, and you'd been transported to another Earth' kind of thing)". This was supposed to be funny but I feel like the mood ended up more serious. I hope you enjoy it, and I hope Lois and the boys are alright. ;-; From their descriptions, I feel like Jordan might gravitate towards Brainy a bit.

“Thanks for coming out here. I wish I could have sent you files, but whatever this encryption is, I can’t even _open_ them, and if Edge might be involved…” Lois sighs. “It might be a Trojan horse.”

Walking towards the farm house with Lois, Brainy smiles. “I should be able to help you.” This place is so different from National City; alive in a disparate way. “And I’m happy to come. It’s good to see you, Lois, and I’m eager to see Jonathan! He must be growing fast, he-”

The door to the house opens and two boys burst out, coming towards them.

Brainy blinks. “He is not a baby anymore…” It can be jarring, having two sets of memories…

_A single infant lost in time and space._

_Two boys who shout excitedly, wondering how he’s_ so good _at video games._

“No.” Lois murmurs, and he knows she feels the strangeness of it too, but before it can even register she’s smiling, putting her hands on her hips. “No sneaking up on you, huh?”

“Super hearing.” Jonathan rolls his eyes. Jordan smiles thinly.

 _Jordan likes you; he’s usually really shy._ He remembers meeting them, not so long after he came to live in this century; helping Jordan with a difficult puzzle in one of his games…

 _You are_ good _with babies._ He smiles at Lois with some measure of pride as he rocks baby Jonathan…

“You’ve grown since the last time I saw you,” He says, masking how disconcerting it is. “ _Teenagers_.”

Jonathan laughs; his smile is like Clark’s, and Kara’s too; open and guileless. “Jordan just got the new Reign of Heroes game, you wanna play?”

Jordan’s smile is almost secret; he’s watchful; he’s got walls. Brainy knows a bit of what that’s like.

“We’ve got some work to do first, but I’d like to see after.”

“Querl’s gonna be here all weekend, you’re definitely gonna have time to play games, but _first_ , may I suggest homework? _We’re_ doing homework.”

“No you’re not.” Jordan says flatly.

“We are doing work at home. Homework.”

“What kind of homework?”

“A bit of light decripting, code breaking, and analysis.” Brainy replies casually.

“So, you know… math.” Lois says, pretending to yawn. “Didn’t you have algebra to do?”

“Don’t remind me.”

"I might be able to assist with that, too.”


	26. End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Major 5x19 spoilers. Brainy fights to hang on. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm gonna reiterate, this is a major spoiler for 5x19. Definitely angst. I tried to get into Brainy's head; not sure how successful this stream of consciousness is, but I hope it feels right.

Everything is agony.

It’s crushing; tearing through him; it feels like it will shatter his bones and rip him apart. His vision flickers darkly, a shudder passing through him and he presses his palm as hard as he can to the console; willing in code ( _wishing it was over_ ).

“ _Hang on_.” Her voice is a spot of clarity, in spite of the roaring in his ears. She is a part of him; they are connected. “Querl, just hang on.” She takes his other hand; he tries to hold it with rigid fingers, a sob escaping him.

“I know.” She whispers.

“K-Kara...” He squeezes his eyes shut, trying to see her face. He can barely think; the pain consumes him. “Alex...” His voice is ragged, cracking and broken. “J’onn...” _For them... save them..._ “The- the Legion...” _Save the future..._ “Winn,” _Save them all..._ “Nia,” He gasps, his body pitching forward; keeps his hand planted--

“That’s right,” She says- the other Querl- her voice is firm, her hand squeezing his. “Remember who you fight for.”

_My friends. My **family**..._

Words slip away from him; his mind crackles like static and there is only raw sound- _pain_ \- his hand on the console... all that matters is his hand on the console. Red writings he can no longer make sense of drift before his eyes. The upload continues. _Focus._ The _pain_ continues. _Please..._ He might be sick; his stomach churns. He tastes salt... Tears. They haven’t burned away... Another sob tears free and he shudders violently, spasming.

His knees give out.

He clings to the console.

“I believe in you.” Querl says to him; she’s circled to his other side, yet he can still feel her hand.

_Stay._

He finds one word.

_stayalivestayyourhandstaywithmepleasepleasestaywithme-_

For a moment, he is lost. Desperately, his eyes seek the upload progress; sparks and spots dancing in his vision. _  
_

_Bottle._

He lets go, panting.

It’s time for the bottle.

**_End._ **

It’s time to end this. _  
_


	27. Junk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ayla thinks Brainy's apartment is a barren wasteland of personality.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In which a prompt asking for Winn bringing Brainy a gift from the future kind of took on a life of its own. I don't know much about Ayla Ranzz apart from out show glimpse of her through Winn, so I hope my version is ok.

The first thing Ayla gives Querl is a little children’s model of a Legion cruiser. “It’s so sparse in here.” She says, looking around his apartment in the Legion Tower. “There’s nothing personal. Nothing that says this is _your_ space.”

“Do the lab monitors not give that impression?”

Ayla rolls her eyes. “No.”

A week later she knocks, and when he lets her in, she walks to the desk with it’s monitors and remote lab capabilities, setting down the model. “I got you this!”

“…Junk?” Querl says flatly.

“Yes.” Ayla answers matter-of-factly. “You need junk, Brainy.”

He eyes the ship rather dubiously and Ayla frowns at him.

“Fine, if you don’t want it-” She picks it up.

“Put it back.”

She blinks. “What?”

“It was a gift.” He meets her gaze and she smiles thinly.

“Alright.” She puts it back, adjusting it slightly. “There.”

A month later, she comes back from a mission in a neighboring system and knocks, coming in to set a small stone plant beside the ship model. “I brought you more junk!” She says proudly. “It’s called a terratree; they like them there. It’s like having a plant on your desk, but you don’t have to worry about it because it’s a rock!”

Querl looks at Ayla, then her offering, then back at Ayla who is grinning.

“You like it? If you look close, there’s these little purple crystal flowers in the leaves.”

He approaches to examine it closer… it _is_ very pretty. “It can stay.”

“I knew you’d like it.”

Querl smiles thinly. He likes it very much.

A smooth and shiny bluish stone joins the terratree and the model ship, then a tiny Supergirl figurine from the museum. One day he’s out to the shops with Ayla, Mon-El, and Nura, when something catches his eye… a bauble in the shape of a cat, to be hung from one’s ship starter.

Ayla gasps. “You need it.”

“He does?” Mon-El looks at it curiously. Nura is smiling.

“I like it…” Querl says. It’s a strange feeling. It’s useless, silly, and yet it makes him _happy_. He buys it. Back in his apartment, he puts markings like his inhibitors on the cats head. _Something that says it’s mine._

Long after that day (it feels like another lifetime to Querl), Winn comes back to visit– the first proper visit, not marred by an evil doppelganger. In a moment alone with Querl, he speaks up. “Hey, I brought you something.”

“You did?”

Winn nods, grinning, and hands Querl a box.

“Ayla said to bring it to you, she wouldn’t tell me what it is, so I’m _kind of_ dying to know.”

Querl opens the box, and smiles to himself.

“Well? What is it?”

Querl looks to him, still smiling. “Junk.”


	28. Find the Bottle (Save the World)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meeting Earth Prime's Kara reminds Querl of his own Kara.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Getting a bit experimental again with this one. This was inspired by Jesse talking about the multiverse and how maybe in one of them Karadox is canon and the possibilities are limitless; a nice thought for my multishipping heart! I thought of Earnest Brainy and Kara, but I thought of Bottle Brainy, too, and his desperation, and how our Kara’s words gave him pause. Maybe our Kara is very much like his, and helps him remember who he is. This drabble is what spun from that jumble of ideas. I hope you enjoy it.

Seeing _Kara_ sends a shiver through him. 

Kara is alive? 

_Kara is in stasis_. 

Kara is _dead_ ( _unless I set her free_ ).

She is _so_ like her... Her eyes, her manner _\- her heart?_

Querl’s arms wrap a little tighter around himself, and for a moment it’s not an act. For a moment he is lost, for all is lost unless he finds the bottle. He thinks of Kara- _his_ Kara- and the look in her eyes as he prepared it...

_This is the only way._

_Querl, we’ll stop it-_

_There is no stopping it!  
_

The truth. Then sorrow... fear... Yet still she took his hand, and somehow... _hope_. 

_I trust you._

_I will see you again._ He’d whispered it; a promise; then pulled away from her... bottle the world, find a safe harbor from the end of everything, then make this right... _I love you, Kara._

She caught his hand again, for just a moment, before she let him go. _You’re a good man, Querl Dox. I love you._

Her words fill him with _purpose_ now. 

Find the bottle. 

Save the world.


	29. For the Sake of Knowledge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Winn asks Brainy about a dark entry in his file.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This spun from a question asking what Winn might have heard about Brainy's mother.

“Can I ask you something?” Winn sits near Brainy, watching him, and already fears he’s overstepped, but...

“What is it?” Brainy looks up from his work, his eyes meeting Winn’s with askance.

Winn takes a deep breath, not sure how exactly to broach this particular topic. “I, uh... I saw your file. With the Legion.” Brainy gives a slight nod, his expression changing subtly to something a little more guarded, but he doesn’t look angry so Winn goes on. “Did your mother-... did she really try to kill you?”

“Yes.” Brainy answers softly. “She did.”

Winn nods slowly, then gets up, going to sit closer to Brainy. “There wasn’t a lot of information, just... just that you faced her and she-...”

“Electrocuted me with my own technology?” Brainy’s tone is dry but darkness seeps into it, too. Winn wants to put a hand on his shoulder, to hug him, even, but he holds off, unsure if it would be welcome just now.

“Why...?”

“For the sake of knowledge, I suppose...” His voice goes soft, and in it there is old hurt; the kind it’s hard to ever really leave behind. “She wanted to see what she would feel.”

“What the fuck...” Winn breathes, and Brainy’s lips curl into a rueful, faint smile.

“She was not a good person. Nor a good mother. I have made my peace with that."

“That’s... that’s good.”

“I am glad that you’ve found some peace over your father.”

“Yeah... Yeah, me too.” Winn catches the shift in subject, but doesn’t press. “It’s... a weight lifted.”

Brainy smiles warmly, though his eyes are still sad. Winn knows he’s carrying a new weight now; one he’s stuck holding basically alone.

“For what it’s worth... from what I’ve heard? You couldn’t be farther from her. You’re _selfless_ , Brainy. She was definitely not that.”

Brainy leans slightly so his shoulder touches Winn’s, and in the gesture there is gratitude and solidarity and ache. “Thank you.” He murmurs, then looks to him. “You have gotten _very_ good at the pep talk.”

Winn snorts. “Kind of a Legion necessity, right?”

Some amusement comes into his dark eyes and it makes the tightness of worry in Winn’s chest ease.

“Just so.”


	30. Proud

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> J'onn learns how Brainy got his inhibitors.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A wee short because I got a request for how J'onn might react to learning how Brainy got his inhibitors. I feel like I was a little shaky on connecting these dots, but J’onn feels for Brainy and also adopts him; I don’t make the rules, Space Dad is Space Dad.

J’onn looks... sad. For a long moment, he gazes at Brainy, then hugs him, breathing a sigh.

“I’m alright...” Brainy murmurs. “It was a long time ago, and I... Now I am myself.”

Drawing back, J’onn holds Brainy at arm’s length, looking at him. “It’s not unlike Ma'alefa'ak... We feared what he might become, and made the choice to shut him away rather than _help_ him.”

“You’ve found peace now. Together.”

“Yes.” J’onn nods. “And I could not be more thankful for that.”

Brainy smiles thinly, and J’onn gets a tentative sort of look.

“Is your father still alive in the future, Brainy?”

“I don’t know.” He answers, growing pensive; his thoughts traveling a thousand years.

J’onn nods. “You have family, here and now. We love you, Brainy. Know peace in that.” Brainy smiles, something warm igniting in his chest. “You’re heart is good. You chose that on your own.” J’onn smiles warmly. “Any good father should be proud of you.” He gives Brainy’s arm a little squeeze. “I know I am.”

“Thank you.” Brainy whispers, feeling a prickle in his eyes. “Thank you, J’onn.”


	31. Miracles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another Brainy meets another Kara; the world is full of miracles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got a request for Five (Yellow Boots Brainy) and Kara, and this is what came to mind.

Pulling on his yellow boots, Querl pauses a moment, looking to Kara; admiring her. She catches him (well, he wasn’t hiding it) and smiles. He smiles back, wanting to kick the boots back off and curl up with her again.

It’s a sweet memory; beautiful, precious, and when this world’s Kara smiles at him, even though it’s faintly bemused, the memory is alive, tangible. He can feel her arms around him and her lips against his. He can hear her laugh; spend another moment in her radiance... the multiverse, it seems, is _full_ of miracles.

She’d called _him_ a miracle once. _After everything you’ve lived through... Your parents, your ancestors... You’re still so good, and warm, and just-... incredible._ He smiled to himself. _You’re a miracle, Querl Dox._ He’d taken her hand and spun her, making her laugh... 

He wonders if _this_ Kara likes to dance; considers asking her. Maybe when they have the anti-life equation under control and celebration is in order...

She catches him watching her (she always does) and looks curiously at him, seemingly unsure if she should be amused or concerned.

“Are you alright?”

“Mm.” Querl smiles softly at her. “It’s just... good to see you.”


	32. All I Wanted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brainy wakes to find Kelly watching over him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the prompt "Brainy opening up to Kelly, about what he's gone through".

Alex is with Supergirl and J’onn trying to get a lead on Lex. M’Gann is helping Lena Luthor who is monitoring for any sign of Leviathan. Nia is trying to dream of anything that could help. And Kelly? She’s watching over Querl, who can still feel the tingle of radiation poisoning on his skin. He’s in a sealed room, but Kelly sits beyond a pane of glass, her gaze thoughtful.

“Kelly?” Her eyes meet his; he’s been in and out of consciousness and haze, but he’s feeling lucid now… “I need to- to contact to Supergirl-”

“About the bottle?”

“You know…”

“Nia told us.”

“Oh.” He breathes. _She dreamed of me._

“What were you thinking?” Kelly asks softly.

“What? My mind is sound, I-”

“I’m not asking as a doctor, I’m asking as your _friend_. _What_ were you thinking?”

He has a vague notion of Nia crying; Kara’s gasp; of Alex panicking though he can’t make out her words. He feels tears welling in his eyes that he tries to blink away. “I had to. For all of you. I had to keep you _safe_.”

“What…?” Now it’s Kelly who’s caught off guard.

He gets up slowly and Kelly hedges, but his legs hold his weight and he walks to the glass. “There is so much to explain… To all of you…”

“Then explain.”

His eyes meet Kelly’s and he gathers himself… he knows he will have to tell it all again; to Kara, Nia- all of the people he loves that he’s lied to… Best to start now, so he starts from the beginning; tells her everything…

“…After she showed me what would happen- what I had to do to stop such horrible things from coming to pass, I… It was the only way. I didn’t want to push my friends away, or- or to hurt Nia- I-” The tears come again, born of sorrow. “I didn’t _want_ to be alone.” He wipes at his eyes and tries to steady himself, needing her to understand. “Every last moment, all I wanted was to keep all of you _safe_.”

“I believe you, Brainy.” Kelly’s voice is consoling; her hand touches the glass gently, and Querl lays his hand against it too. “We’ll have you out of here soon, ok? And then you can help us finish what you started. We’ll stop Leviathan. And Lex Luthor, too.”

Querl sucks in a breath, feeling a fresh wave of tears , these ones born of gratitude.

“I promise.” His eyes meet hers with all the conviction he has. “That is all I want.”

Kelly nods, then turns as the other door on her side of the glass opens.

“Nia…” Querl whispers.

“You’re awake…” Nia wraps her arms around herself, uncertain; wary.

“And he can explain.” Kelly says softly, going to Nia and laying a hand on her shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze.

Nia takes a deep breath, looking to Kelly, then to Querl. Slowly, she approaches the glass, still guarded.

“Ok… explain.”


	33. Goodbye / Hello

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Season three. Winn goes. Querl stays.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing something a bit new for me– Brainy at the end of season three. I hope this feels right and captures him well.

Winn’s friends- his family- throw a party to say goodbye. Querl knows a bit of what that’s like; he’s had to make his own goodbyes, most of them quietly, without much fuss. _I’ll be back soon. Eventually. Maybe._ He attends, with Imra and Mon-el, for a little while, but in it there is a sense of intrusion… It is because of him these goodbyes must happen; because of his family; because, because… So he retreats to the Legion Cruiser, and Mon-El and Imra follow after him to make their own farewells. He wouldn’t call it a party, but there is comfort in it. There is a second cruiser; smaller, hidden, in case of emergency; his ring can contact them in the future if need be, too. This is for his protection, and yet as he steps off the cruiser, shaking hands with Winn briefly before he boards, he is seized by grief. He has found he cannot calculate this– what will happen now. There are too many unknowns.

So Winn goes. Querl stays.

_As it must be._

He watches the cruiser vanish into the sky and breathes in, his eyes lingering on the spot for a long time… They don’t come back. His shoulders sag and he finally looks down.

“You’ll be ok.”

Starting, he turns to look at Supergirl- _Kara_. She looks sympathetic. It makes him feel vulnerable in a way that often makes him bristle, but with Kara…

“I assure you I am fine.”

With Kara he lies quite calmly.

“You sure?”

_Perhaps not very well though._

“When I came to Earth from Krypton is was…” She pauses, looking for the right word. “ It was an adjustment.” Looking up at the sky, for a moment her gaze goes somewhere far back in her memory. She brings herself back, looking to Querl again.

“Yes.” He concedes. “That is an apt description.”

“And right now I miss Winn already.” She confesses.

Querl swallows. “I’m sorry.” He murmurs, looking down.

“Hey,” She hesitates a moment, then touches his arm. “I’m not sorry you’re here.” She squeezes gently.

His breath catches and he gives a quick nod. The Girl of Steel’s touch is soft, warm, even though he is not Winn. Even though he is here instead of him.

“I just thought-… you must miss them, too.”

His eyes meet hers and he nods again. When he speaks he gives her the truth. “Yes… Yes, I do.”

Kara gauges him a moment, then slowly she hugs him. He blinks in surprise, then hugs slowly back. Something tight in Querl’s chest eases a little, and when they break apart, Kara’s smile is heartfelt; reassuring.

“If there’s anything you need, I’m here. You’ve got friends here.”

“Thank you.” Querl breathes. Not for the first time grateful for Kara Zor-El.


	34. I Recognize You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Lex is defeated, Brainy and Nia watch the sun rise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s been eighty-seven years since I wrote Supergirl… Just kidding, it’s been like two months, but I’m feeling rusty. I hope this moment between Brainy and Nia makes you smile.

The sun rises. Querl did not think he would ever see another sunrise, but Lex is defeated, Querl is not dead, and the sun is glinting on the horizon, mixing colors into the fading night sky. It’s beautiful. He’s not sure he really deserves to behold such a thing.

“Brainy?” 

He turns, surprised to see Nia.

“Hello…”

“By yourself again?” Her voice is tentative; perhaps she feels as uncertain as he does.

“I was watching the sun rise…”

“Pretty,” Nia murmurs, looking at the horizon. “Would it be ok if I sat with you?”

“Yes.” He breathes, feeling something tighten in his chest… fear. Fear that this fragile moment could fall to pieces. Fear that that’s what he deserves, even after everything. “I’m sorry, Nia… That I had to hurt you.”

“You did mention that.” She smiles thinly and the knot in Querl’s chest loosens a little.

“It bears repeating, I think.”

“I still don’t know if I understand it all… but if you say there was no other way…” She still seems to be turning it all over in her head, all that has happened between them from the moment he removed his inhibitors to the moment she dreamed him dying, and on to this moment between them now. She looks to him, her eyes meeting his. “I believe you, Brainy.”

He feels tears well in his eyes, nods, takes a breath. “I hope that one day you can forgive me. That we can be friends again.”

Slowly she takes his hand, squeezes. “We’re friends, Brainy.”

“We are?”

She nods. “Yeah, we are.”

With his free hand he brushes at the tears that fall down his cheeks. He feels an immeasurable sense of gratitude.

“Dying alone was not the smartest move I’ve ever seen you make though, I might be mad about that for a little while longer.” She says it softly, smiling wanly again. “Just a little.”

He smiles ruefully. “Perhaps that is fair. It did not go quite as planned.”

“I’m glad.” Her voice remains soft, but it becomes firm. “It means you’re still here.” She squeezes his hand again, tighter this time, as if she fears he might vanish if she doesn’t hang on. “We _want you_ here.”

“Even after everything?” He holds her hand tight, too. “It seemed the odds were against me.”

“Never tell me the odds.”

“Ah. Star Wars.”

She grins and he can’t help but to smile back, and for a moment nothing has changed. The moment ends. Her mirth fades, her shoulders sagging under the weight of all that has passed between them.

“I should have trusted you… you’re the smartest person in the universe and I didn’t trust you…”

“I did not make it easy to.” He concedes. “I made myself a stranger.”

“I recognize you now.” She hesitates a moment, then she hugs him; says the words he’s needed to hear. “I forgive you.”

Slowly his arms wrap around her and he holds her tightly. There are so many scenarios of what happens next; where they go from here… He doesn’t examine them too closely yet. Just now, Querl is content. They hug each other and it is both familiar and new… He is uninhibited; by devices, by fear, by lies, by Lex… 

For the first time he hugs her, finally himself.


	35. No Matter How Small

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Earnest Brainy rescues a kitten, bringing it home to his Kara.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A holiday gift for cyclone-rachel! I hope a little Earnest / Yellow Boots Brainy doing good with his Kara brings you some joy.

The snow is falling hard. It sticks to the ground quickly, blanketing the city in crystalline white, not yet sludgy from tracks and tires and muck. It’s quite the anomaly for the area, but it’s perfectly natural; no weather wielding villain at play, which means Brainy doesn’t have to fix it. It’s a happy thing, being able to simply _enjoy_.

His yellow boots leave a trail he’s more than fairly certain will be gone within an hour if it keeps up like this. The boots are trusty; they’re warm, they’ve got good traction, and his feet are perfectly dry, unlike the tiny shape that catches his eye, huddled and crying as it tries to shelter beneath a dumpster...

He approaches slowly, kneeling and leaning down to get a better look.

“You look like you need some help, little friend.” He says softly, smiling warmly and offering his hand to the coal black kitten. It meows piteously and Brainy glances around, confirming his suspicions: the kitten is very much alone. Frowning, he scooches the tiny ball of fluff closer to him, but it’s reluctant to come out from its hiding place. “Can I help you? You know, I’m on my way somewhere warm. We’ll see if we can find you something to eat, too, huh?”

More mewing, which is answer enough for Brainy. There’s a strikingly low chance the kitten will survive the storm alone, and he’s not one to turn his back on someone in need, no matter how small (and wriggly). 

“You’re alright.” He soothes, putting the kitten into his coat pocket. “Nice and cozy.” His eyes do another quick sweep, then he continues on his way, making a couple of stops to get supplies; thankful some shops are still open in spite of the snow. 

“Sorry I’m late!” He announces as he lets himself into the apartment he shares with Kara. She smiles, coming to greet him and pressing a kiss to his lips then starting.

“Brainy!” She reddens then hisses “ _Alex is here_!”

Brainy blinks, then looks down between them before chuckling. “Oh, kitten,”

“Trying something new?” Looking at them curiously from the couch, Alex raises a brow.

“No, not a pet name,” He reaches into his pocket. “A kitten!” 

Kara gasps and takes the tiny creature, instantly fawning. 

“Hiii!” She coos. “Oh my gosh, look at you.” The kitten meows and Alex approaches.

“You brought a little kitty,” She strokes its head gently with one finger before looking to Brainy. “It can’t be very old.”

“It was all alone in the snow.“ He holds up the bag of supplies. “I’ve got what we’d need to care for it- I hope you don’t mind.”

“ _Mind?_ ” Kara sounds aghast at the very idea that she would be mad about a kitten in the apartment; it brings a soft smile to Brainy’s lips. She sits, still cradling the kitten in her hands. Alex nudges Brainy lightly and offers an approving grin as he moves to prepare some food.

“Weren’t you two thinking of getting a cat? Now you just happen to rescue a kitten on your way home. What are the odds of that?”

“I can do the math.”

Alex snorts. “Maybe later.”

“We’re gonna make sure you’re _safe_ , and _cozy_ , and _happy_.” Kara is telling the kitten. It actually seems to be listening to her, mewing where it’s settled on her lap and accepting ear scritches.

“Don’t forget well fed.” Brainy offers, filling a syringe with what he’s put together. “You’re still very small, so we’ll try this first.”

“Thank you, Brainy.” Kara looks to him with such genuine gratitude it gives him pause.

“I just did what was right.”

“I know.” She smiles softly. “That’s why I love you.”


End file.
